September 2023 | Mile Nerd

How To Be A Real Man

We hear so much debate about what it means to be a man these days. Such a complex question. In extremely confusing times. So, let’s uncover the answers. I recently surveyed hundreds of women and feel proud to share such valuable information below.

How to be a real man.  

Let’s talk about it…

1 – Knowledge is power.
Are women attracted to simpletons? Of course not. They respond to intelligence. And you should have plenty to offer. Who’s worldly and wise? You are.

Is it necessary to make up a few facts along the way? Absolutely. But we all do that. Think of an encyclopedia with arms and legs. That’s how you should see yourself. Because, more than anything, women love an expert on all subjects.

Does she really need a warm shoulder to cry on? Or someone to vent to after a hard week? Please. What she wants is a list of detailed answers on what to do. Day after day.

Looking into your eyes, she should think, “You just know everything, don’t you?”

Yes.

Yes, you do.

2 – Don’t be creepy.
Consider this…

Women get ogled for years. Often objectified. In a way that you’ve never experienced. Really imagine being stared at by leering weirdos. It’s gross, right? Well, that’s the behavior of your competition. As a real man, your job is to put her at ease when she gets home. Providing relief from all the creepiness of the world.

It’s a simple solution…

Be better than your peers.

The last thing you want to resemble is one of those staring, glaring cavemen. But how do you set yourself apart? Quite easily. By avoiding eye contact as much as possible. It’s the exact opposite of staring. When she’s speaking to you, find an object on the wall to look at. It could be a painting or even just a cobweb. And, when all else fails, focus your gaze on a ballgame or whatever’s happening on television.

Stay conscious of all the slack-jawed leering she deals with in the world.

And be the solution.  

3 – Consider her sensory needs.
Women are wonderfully sensitive creatures. Deeply in touch with all 5 senses in a way that, say, Bob the local mechanic is not. And it’s part of what attracts you. Think about it – do you really want to date a Bob type?

So, ask yourself this question…

How often do you think of a woman’s sensory needs?
(And, no, pervert…we’re not just talking about the sense of touch)

Take her sense of smell, for example. Sure, with you, it’s just a matter of rubbing a bar of Irish Spring on yourself and calling it a day. But now consider all the pleasant smells she cares about. I assume you’ve noticed the way women love perfume and candles, right? See, it’s not enough to be an expert on every subject in the world. You should also want to make her smile as she enters a room. It should feel like a treat to her senses. So, here’s a simple hack to remember:

-A little cologne is good.
-A ton of cologne is better.

Does she smell you in the car whether you’re there or not?
Do her eyes water when you make sudden movements?

(The answer to both questions should be a resounding yes)

Those tears you’ll see? They’re called tears of joy. Because she has a real man who is sensitive to her needs.

4 – Develop your sense of humor.
More than anything, women love to laugh. They respond warmly to men with comedic ability. Luckily, this is very easy…

No need to worry. You don’t even need original material. Just imitate the most charming characters in movie history. Top examples include:
-Jim Carrey from Dumb and Dumber
-Adam Sandler from Billy Madison

You should mimic their dialogue throughout the day. And remember that comedy is about surprises. Be courageous. Blurt out clever one-liners at unexpected times. Things like, “That’s what she said” or “How you doin’.”

This level of gusto will be deeply appreciated. Especially after she’s had a long day and looks tired. And don’t be afraid to take things old school. Very few people are willing to be the guy who shouts “DY-NO-MITE” at random times. But that’s what real men do. In the darkness of a movie theater. Or while a waiter presents a list of nightly specials.

Keep things fun and fresh.

Share the priceless gift of laughter.

5 – Be complimentary.
Amid the day-to-day grind, it’s very easy to forget. But people aren’t mind readers. You can think the world of her, but if you don’t verbalize it, she may never know. And who among us doesn’t love to be complimented? So, give what you wish to receive. Express kindness on a regular basis. Just make sure to avoid doing it in a creepy way. No need to overthink it. Just say the exact same things you’d express to one of your male friends.

For example:
-You’re killing it at the gym. Nice work, dude. You’re bulking up like crazy.
or
-Man, you still look pretty good for your age, dog.

Kindness is the key to a woman’s heart.

Inside of you lives a poet just waiting to get out.

6 – Embrace your feminine side.
Let’s face it. You could probably lower your defenses a little more. Am I right? There’s just no reason to act so hard all the time. Aren’t you getting tired of it? Because one thing’s for sure…

Real men are willing to soften.

That allows them to make friends, find love, and let people in. The concept of being a tough guy is antiquated. What requires far more courage is to be vulnerable. I’m sure you’ve heard the popular term right now:
“Toxic masculinity.”

So, why not put all that aside? Let yourself cry at a movie. Sing along with a catchy Britney Spears song. And come up with a cute, non-threatening name for your penis. Maybe refer to it as “Suzanne” or “Jennifer.”

A little spoiler alert from this game called life:
Nothing says real man like naming your genitalia “Alice.”

7 – Be a man of mystery.
It’s very important to shake up your stale routines. Is anything more attractive than someone who keeps things interesting? A real man is unpredictable. And that adventurous spirit is achievable without much effort. No need to climb mountains or even leave your home. Plenty of unpredictability can be found within your four walls. For example…

Change the channel frequently. This creates a sense of excitement. One in which there seems to be no rhyme or reason at all. You should also use a dozen different water glasses per day. Why do you do that? Nobody knows. Not even you. But it adds to your mysterious nature.

On a regular basis, she should look at an empty container you’ve put back in the pantry and wonder:
“What on earth is he doing?”

Being a man of mystery, that’s what.  

8 – Deepen friendships.
Far too much of the focus between men and women is on sex. But what about friendship? It’s something that real men care deeply about. Sure, we all think of ourselves as “givers.” But true givers always look to do more. And nothing touches the heart of a woman more than a guy who gets along with her friends. So, take the initiative…

-Really engage with her close friends.
-Send them “Happy Birthday” gifs that show you remember their big day.
-Pick up the phone if they seem lonely. Ask questions that reflect your curiosity.
(Like how work is going. Or what they’re wearing)
-Continue deepening these connections. Not just in group hangouts. Really invest in quality one-on-one time. Make an evening out of it. Bring a nice bottle of wine. And maybe some flowers.

These are just a few of the gestures that real men are willing to make. But do it all quietly. Because nobody likes a braggart. Remember, this isn’t to receive credit. A real man is a giver. And sharing yourself with others is what you’re all about.