The Best Thing You Can Do for Yourself and Others
Some of the best advice that John Maxwell has received throughout his leadership journey has been from his father, and today, he’s sharing that advice with you! In this episode, John is passing on some of the most transformative insights from his own mentor on success and adding value.
After his lesson, Mark Cole and Traci Morrow discuss what stood out to them and give you practical ways to apply it to your life and leadership.
Our BONUS resource for this episode is the Best Thing You Can Do for Yourself and for Others Worksheet, which includes fill-in-the-blank notes from John’s teaching. You can download the worksheet by clicking “Download the Bonus Resource” below.
Take the next step in your growth journey and become a Maxwell Leadership Certified Team Member. Click here to speak with a Program Advisor today!
Mark Cole:
Welcome to the Maxwell Leadership podcast. I’m Mark Cole. And as you know, our goal, just like John’s legacy statement that he will make in the lesson today, is to add value to you so that you will then go and multiply value to others. In this week’s episode, John is talking about how you can intentionally grow the people on your team. Now, on John Maxwell’s podcast, you know, we talk about personal growth. Often today’s a little bit different because the purpose, the focal, the focal point of growth is so that you can grow with others around you. So in this lesson, my good friend and co host, Chris Goede and I will be talking about not only how we grow ourselves, but some practical ways that you can apply what John’s taught and all of grow the people around you as well. If you would like to download the bonus resource for this episode, you can go to maxwellpodcast.com/growyourpeople.
Mark Cole:
If you’re a longtime listener to the podcast and you would like to check us out on YouTube, we have the podcast available to you. And love our YouTube family as well. I’m so excited about today. I’m so excited about growing. I’m so excited about growing you so you can grow others. Here is John Maxwell.
John Maxwell:
Here’s the thesis of the lesson. The most effective way to grow an organization is to grow the people in it. That’s a fact. There are no limits to an organization if we put no limits on our people. So what are some growth practices of growing people? As I’ve studied growing people, there are some things that you can just say are true about those people that are developing. Number one, the first growth practice is to develop a game plan to grow others. In other words, growth is not an accident. So if you’re gonna grow, you’ve gotta have a game plan.
John Maxwell:
You have to be intentional. Growth is not an automatic process. It just doesn’t happen accidentally. Okay? The highest function of a leader is not just to lead others. The highest function of a leader is to produce leaders who can lead others. In other words, let’s just talk about logical choice for just a moment. It’s wonderful if we can train you and equip you to be a leader. But it’s even more wonderful when we can train, equip you to be a leader, to turn around and train someone else to be a leader.
John Maxwell:
You see, if it’s only stops with you, it’s only addition. But if it goes beyond you, it becomes multiplication. And so when we talk about growing organizations, how do we compound ourselves? How do we multiply ourselves? By training people to train others. It’s never enough just to know. We must be doers of what we know. Increase comes by action, not by knowledge. So mentoring requires being before doing. And we have no business practicing what we have not become.
John Maxwell:
This is why maturity must come before success. Character must precede our career. If maturity doesn’t come before success, guess what? How many times have we seen people who grabbed hold of success but didn’t have maturity, maturity, and, you know, they just basically sabotage themselves. So when we grow people, one of the practices, one of the principles of growing people is very simple. You have to have a game plan. It has to be intentional. Number two, you have to put yourself in the personal growth picture. In other words, very simple.
John Maxwell:
This isn’t for others, this is for you. Have you ever heard somebody teach and you listen to them teach and you thought, man, that is so good. I wish so and so was here to hear that. You know what I’m saying? I gotta write this down and I gotta tell them because they really need this. Now, I wanna make myself real clear. I’m not talking about the person to your left. I’m not talking about the person to your right. I’m talking about you.
John Maxwell:
It’s impossible to grow people in the organization if the growth is always for someone else. It always starts with me. And now that takes me to what I consider to be the number one motivational principle in the world. People do what people see. 89%. This is not in your notes. Stanford research will tell you, 89% of what you and I learn, we learn visually. And what is leadership? Leadership is visual.
John Maxwell:
Leadership is visually showing others the example. So if you’re going to grow people within the organization, it’s got to start with you as the leader. It starts with you. The key to equipping is modeling. Most of what we learn is observed, caught, not taught. Great leaders take the vision from me to we. But make no mistake, it starts with me. The third thing that we need to do to grow ourselves and have a growing organization, put your people in the personal growth picture.
John Maxwell:
After you put yourself in there and say, I’m responsible to grow me. Now put your people in the picture and say, I’m responsible to grow them. Malcolm Gladwell, in his book the Tipping Point, talks about. He calls it the law of the few. And he discusses the leverage a leader can have by investing in a few who can have great impact on others. There are certain people who can help you create change and forward progress because they will talk. It with and influence other people. In other words, the law of the few from Gladwell was just very simple.
John Maxwell:
You go find the few that are going to have the heavy producing, and you put your time, effort and energy in that. My legacy statement is, I want to add value to leaders who multiply value to others. So what do I spend my time with the leaders. Number four, create a growth culture in your organization. If you want to grow the people within your organization, you gotta change the culture of your organization and have a growth culture. A growth culture includes one behavior of leaders that show the value of personal growth. In other words, a growth culture. A logical choice is the fact that you see leaders that are growing and in their behavior.
John Maxwell:
So it just says, oh, my goodness, my leaders are growing. Number two, intentional practices that encourage personal growth. In other words, what are the intentional practices? That logical choice that you can use? What are the good choices you can make that will really show personal growth? What are the intentional practices we’re gonna have? Let me give you just four real quick examples. Personal development breaks where you give a person maybe a day to reflect on where they are and are they growing and are they developing. Remember, reflection turns experience into insight. That’s what reflection does. Number two is personal development training. In other words, do you have time set aside for training and learning? What specific thing are you doing here that would say, this is how we’re developing and growing leaders.
John Maxwell:
What is our plan? The third area is personal development discussion. Time for sharing. That’s where you get together and you talk about how you’re growing, how you’re learning. One of the things I learned early in developing people is the fact that the more you can get them to sit around the table and talk about how they’re growing and how they’re learning, the more contagious it becomes. And then finally, personal development projects. Time for experience. What are the projects? What projects are you now doing that would develop personal growth? Creating this culture of personal development essentially helps your employees to raise the bar a little higher for themselves, their families, and for each other. Jim Rohn, don’t just help people with their jobs, but help people with their lives, as your greater purpose would have you to do.
John Maxwell:
Touch people and teach people not just job skills, but life skills. Don’t just teach people how to work, but how to live, how to assimilate, how to accumulate far greater treasures than just a paycheck. Growth principle number five. In growing people and growing organizations. Number five, connect with them. If you’re going to grow your people, you’ve got to have that connection with them and connecting requires energy. So you got to give it a lot of effort. And connecting requires understanding.
John Maxwell:
You got to ask a lot of questions. So when people come to me and say, you know what? I want to develop and equip and trade people. I want to grow people in my organization, I ask them, are you willing to give the energy? And part of the energy that you give in connecting with people is, are you willing to listen? Because the great leaders, they listen, they learn, and then they. And that’s a cycle that never stops. They listen, they learn, and they lead. So, connecting goals. When you connect with people, there are some goals that you have. One is to strengthen relationships.
John Maxwell:
So when you connect with a person, the relationships become stronger. Number two, to earn trust, you cannot connect, and I cannot connect with anyone without earning trust. Thirdly, to position them properly goes back to, you know, Jim Collins, get the right people on the bus with me. Get them in the right seat in the bus. Four, to create clear expectations of what you want to get accomplished. Five, to determine capacity. What is their capacity? What is their potential? And six, to discover strengths. This is all part of connecting with people.
John Maxwell:
Okay? To grow people within your organization, let’s go to number six. Give them a challenging project now, a challenging project. Here’s what it’ll do. This will help them. This will help determine when you set the bar high for people. This helps determine the emotional, creative, and ability capacity of people. And these are different things. You want to see emotionally what their capacity is, because I know a lot of people, they have the ability, but they don’t have the emotional capacity.
John Maxwell:
So you wanna check, how are they emotionally, how are they creatively, and how are they ability wise? What is their ability capacity, creative capacity, and emotional capacity. You wanna begin to test that to find out what they are. In other words, here’s what a leader is always asking. A leader is always asking, how much can they do? How do I get maximum potential out of a person? Number seven, if you’re gonna grow people in the organization, you have to empower them. Got to empower them.
John Maxwell:
Wow.
John Maxwell:
If all you give your people are orders, all that you’ll ever get from them is order takers. And one of the things that is essential in growing people is empowerment. So let me talk to you about empowerment for just a moment. Empowerment is all about big picture. First of all, it’s not just doing the task. Empowerment is why you do the task. See, empowerment is much bigger than the job you do. It is making you the person, not only to be able to do that job, but to make you a person that’s bigger than that job, it’s big picture.
John Maxwell:
That’s what empowerment is. And empowerment is about accountability, because once people have been given power, they become accountable. Ken Blanchard writes, empowerment means you have the freedom to act. It also means you’re accountable for results. I like that a lot. One last closing thing had a person come up to me one time, said, John, all this training and equipping people you talk about all the time I’ve done that. And let me tell you, the downside of training and equipping and empowering people and then growing people is the fact that you train them and then they, they leave you and go to another company. You say, man, I just put time, money, resources in that person there.
John Maxwell:
They went off with someone else and they’re going to reap the benefits. I said, nothing could be worth than putting that time, effort, energy and money and people and training them and then having them leave. I said, oh, no, no. I can tell you something that’s a lot worse than that. This is what’s that? Not training them and having them stay. So let’s begin to grow our people so we can grow our organization.
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Mark Cole:
Hey, welcome back. I’m so glad to be digging into this with Chris. I think you, Chris, I certainly want to. One of our greatest passions, growing the team around us, there’s a quote by Jack Welch that says the most important job you have is growing your people, giving them a chance to reach their dreams. And I think that’s so true. I think that’s a chief responsibility of leadership, is to let your leadership be such that it impacts others. John asked this question. We meet with a lot of presidents and senates and representatives from other countries, and John will ask them the question all the time.
Mark Cole:
Will the people be better when your job here is done? And I love that question. It’s a great question for all of us as leaders, will people that you’re leading be better because of your leadership? And certainly helping them grow is a chief responsibility, 100%.
Chris Goede:
And you know, one of my favorite books that John has written in the last couple years is the leader’s greatest return. And as executives around the world will be like, hey, you got to read this book, right? Leaders Grace return. So what do they do? They want to know right down at the bottom of the financials, like, how does this improve my EBITda?
Mark Cole:
Exactly.
Chris Goede:
That’s not what John’s talking about at all. And I think that as you begin to develop and grow in your leadership, when you begin to see the fruit of people that are around you because of your intentionality, which we’re going to talk a little bit about that today, and who’s all involved in the growth process, man, that’s the greatest return, no doubt, right? We’re in the people business. We talk about that, and that’s what’s important. Let me from my lens real quick. Let me start us off with something. I think it’s so important. So if you’re in an organization, you’re leading a team or an organization, I am fascinated to watch the surveys that come back on an annual basis of why people are choosing certain organizations over another. What is it about it? Of course, culture is part of that.
Chris Goede:
Of course, compensation is a part of that skillset. Match all this up. But it is fascinating to watch this one line that I’ve seen move up over the last couple of years where it says they have to be assured that there is a growth and a career, personal growth and a career development plan in place for them. Before they say yes, I’m like, oh, my gosh, like there are organizations that are not even thinking about this. And so I just wanted to throw that out there because we’re going to talk today about game plan. We’re going to talk about growth personally. How do you develop people around you? What is the culture of your organization in regards to growth look like? And it’s just so important. It’s so important.
Chris Goede:
So let’s dive in. This is, this is what we do, right? We’re here to help people on a journey, a leadership journey. And so part of that is developing a game plan. And not only a game plan for your personal growth, but also for others. And I know that ever since I’ve been inside this organization with you, there is intentionality behind here is what our expectations are of leaders. To have a plan for those that are working with you on the team. To take them from point a sometimes might be to point b, sometimes it might be to k. So as you lead Maxwell leadership, and it’s such a passion for you, why we, you and I could talk about sports analogies all the time, but why is it so important to have a game plan for growth for, for other people inside the organization or your team?
Mark Cole:
Yeah. Well, the first thing I’d say, the reason it’s important. Cause it was a game changer for me.
Chris Goede:
Yeah.
Mark Cole:
I’ve said often on this podcast that it was truly the question that David Hoyt asked me, what is your growth plan? As my leader in Jon’s organization, that made me aware I needed to be intentional about my growth. And most of the time we have people on our team that don’t even know they need to be focused on that. I love the stat that you gave just a moment ago, and I believe that’s right. For so long, we paid people because why were we paying them? To help grow our company. But yet we didn’t realize that that should be reciprocated. And if we grow them, pay them well, but grow them, guess what happens? They grow the company.
Chris Goede:
That’s right.
Mark Cole:
And I think that real revelation, both as a company owner and as a person that’s worked for a company for a long time, it really does go both ways. So I think the first reason I would answer that is, is it made such a difference for me. I want it to make a difference for others. It’s a true heart to see others be impacted by intentionality around growth. I think also, as a business owner, what I just said is if I grow people, their enhanced capacity expands their responsibility in the organization, so the organization grows. I think the other reason that I would tell you is when you create a human element, that it’s more than just the colloquialism. Our people are our greatest asset. No.
Mark Cole:
When you really begin to create a culture that says, we are going to challenge our people, and not only challenge them, we’re going to require them to identify how they’re growing. I get asked all the time, how do I get good people on the team? I’d say you’ve got to hire growing people. Hire good people. Okay, that’s easy. Everybody says, no, no, hire growing people. So to this day, when I’m interviewing somebody, which y’all don’t let me do very much anymore, you do not.
Chris Goede:
Or John, you or John, me or John, same category.
Mark Cole:
But when I do get to interview people, my standout question in every interview is what are you growing in right now and how is it making a difference for you and how is it making a difference for the people around you? That growth question and creating that growth culture begins to let people know, hey, personal growth is important. It’s required. It’s expected in an organization like that.
Chris Goede:
Yeah. And I think what I love about this being number one as a game plan is in order to have a game plan, by the way, it takes some preparation, it takes for you as an individual to sit down and say, hey, I’ve got to intentionally think about what am I going to do over the next 30, 60, 90 days in this plan for Mark, if Mark and I were working together. Right. Like what I love about that is you can’t just walk into a meeting and say, hey, we’re going to go ahead and start coaching and we’re going to do this and we’re going to do that. And I want to see growth in this area. Like you got to come back and say, what does this plan look like? How are we going to attack the game? What are we going to do in the first quarter, the second quarter, we’ll make some adjustments at halftime. What do we do in the third quarter and the fourth quarter? The other reason I love this is that then it gives you something to measure against.
Mark Cole:
That’s exactly right.
Chris Goede:
Right. Like we can sit in here and philosophically say we’re gonna grow our team at the end of the year, say, well, where’d you grow? Okay, that’s great. But now let’s go back and look at what we, we talked about twelve months ago. Where, where are we at on that? And it’s, whether you do it by assessments or you do it through conversation, whatever it might be, that’s the importance of having that game plan.
Mark Cole:
And again, it was when David said, you need a growth plan. Here’s a template. And then what is it? Talk back to me that it really made a difference to me. I say this all the time. I don’t scholarship people for growth. They need to bet on themselves. I’m going to go against the flow on that advice today. And I’m going to tell you, listening to podcast, when is the last time you’ve invested in somebody to understand the importance of growth? When is the last time you have given somebody a plan on how to grow? We have a product out there called the 15 Laws of growth.
Mark Cole:
This is a plan by John Maxwell that people can take a multi series, like mastermind, if you will, from John on growing themselves. And just right now you need to pause the podcast. You need to go to the show notes and you need to order this and gift it to somebody that has never had a growth plan and say, I’m going to change your life. It’s Christmas and it’s not even Christmas. Here is a plan for you. And for $99, I’m going to invest in you to grow. You need to do that. You’ve been listening to this podcast.
Mark Cole:
You’ve been listening to this podcast. That’s a part of your plan. Why don’t you go and give somebody with a plan on your team?
Chris Goede:
I love that. Not to discourage you from listening to Mark and I, but if you think there’s some nuggets here, there’s some gold in them there hills in that content piece right there, it is, because that is the master talking about. So I love that idea to develop a game plan for somebody else and give it. Give it to them. So we talk about this as a game plan, and I want to take just a minute because as we’ve talked about in the past, right? We’ve got to grow ourselves and that has to happen. You talked about David challenging you, and that question changed the way that you do your year end planning, not only personally, but professionally. And all of what comes out of that, inevitably is a growth plan for the organization, no doubt a growth plan for your family and a growth plan for Mark Cole. What I love about that growth plan for you, and John talks about this under number two, and we’re just going to stay here for just a second where he says, put yourself in that growth picture because it really starts with you.
Chris Goede:
What I love about what you do, Mark, as a leader in this area, is you share often with what you’re learning. And what you’re learning often comes from that game plan. And so there’s not a meeting that doesn’t go by. There’s not a conversation that doesn’t go where you’re saying, man, let me tell you what I read this morning and how this impacted. When you’re doing that as a leader, are you doing that naturally as it just happened? Are you intentional about that? In order for us to absorb that, to learn something, what’s in your mind behind sharing what you’re learning? Because there’s not a meeting that we’re in where you don’t start off the meeting doing that.
Mark Cole:
It’s extremely intentional, to answer your question, is it intentional? And it’s intentional for really three reasons. One, selfish. If I will constantly be talking about what I am learning, it keeps me accountable. To do what? To learn and to apply what I’m learning. Right. It’ll keep me accountable. I want everybody to know I am not only committed to learning, I’m going to share with you real time what I’m learning. It makes me accountable to the idea of learning, and it makes me accountable to the current lesson.
Chris Goede:
That’s great.
Mark Cole:
It’s incredibly intentional, and it is very selfish. And it stinking works. Okay. It makes a difference. The second reason that I do it is because I’m setting the tone of expectation of growth in the organization.
Chris Goede:
That’s right.
Mark Cole:
And I’m telling you this, that’s not selfish. That is leadership.
Chris Goede:
That’s right.
Mark Cole:
Hey, friends, we’re back with a brand new episode of the Maxwell Leadership podcast, and I’m truly excited to have you with us today. We’re the podcast truly that is committed to adding value to leaders who will, in turn, multiply value to others. My name is Mark Cole, and on today’s episode, John Maxwell is going to be sharing with us the best advice he has ever received. Now, what you’re gonna hear in this podcast, and I’ll talk a little bit more about it after John’s done talking. But you’re gonna hear John’s map of adding value to people, how he challenges us to think of ways to add value to people. And when I heard his lesson today, and I just was listening to this lesson before we got into the studio, and I went, wow, it was that idea that started this podcast over 320 episodes ago. Yeah, we started this podcast. We said, john, we don’t need any of your time.
Mark Cole:
We’re going to start this podcast, and I’m going to show you how you can add value and look at a new way to add value. So five plus years ago, we started this journey, and now, over 300 episodes. It never gets old when I get to meet you podcast friends around the world. Just last week, I was in Brazil, and I met one of the top judges in all of Brazil. He came up to me and he said, mark Cole. He walked right past John Maxwell. He said, mark Cole, I had to meet you because I have now heard 300 episodes. This morning, on the way to this event, I listened to my 300th episode, and you said, x, y, and z.
Mark Cole:
And he told me what I said, and he said, it changed my life. And I went, whoa, that’s a little bit more value than I anticipated. Just yesterday, I was on the phone with a financial advisor to my family. He helps my mom. And he said, mark, two weeks ago on the podcast, you said, x, y, and z. And then he used my words against me and his advice to my mom. But here’s what I really want to tell you. This podcast is meant to add value to you so you can multiply value to others.
Mark Cole:
So listen to John’s lesson. It inspired a podcast that now has had over 40 million downloads. And what is it going to inspire in you now? After John’s lesson, I’m going to do what I always do. I’m going to be joined by a co host. And today, Traci Morrow, one of my favorite people in the universe, is with me, and we’re going to talk about this vital piece of advice. We’re going to help you apply it to your life and your leadership. Make sure if you’re new to the podcast or if you’re an existing friend, make sure to go to maxwellleadership.com/BestThing to download the bonus resource for this episode. And there you can find out how to watch the episode on YouTube.
Mark Cole:
So grab a pen, grab a piece of paper, challenge yourself. We’re going to add value to one another. Here is John C. Maxwell.
John Maxwell:
I want to talk to you about the best advice that I ever received. If I entitled the lesson, I would call it the best thing you can do for yourself and for others. Okay? When I graduated from college, my father, who happened to be the president of the first college I graduated from, I sat down with him. I was getting ready to begin my life, my calling, and I asked him for advice. And what he told me was the best advice I ever received. And this is going to be the core of the lesson. He said to me, john, if you want to be successful, three things you need to do every day. Value people, believe in people, and unconditionally love people.
John Maxwell:
He said, if you’ll do those three things, you’ll always have people follow you. You’ll always be a person of influence. Because it’s all about people and people. Most of them don’t feel valued. Few of them ever have anyone that really believes in them. And he said, hardly anyone has anyone that unconditionally loves them. And I have taken that advice. Value people, believe in people, unconditionally love people.
John Maxwell:
And in every book I write, I take it through that grid. Every teaching I take, like today, I take it through that grid. I continually, continually remember that in everything I do and everything that I am, I value people, believe in people, and unconditionally love them. What I think about the best thing I could do for myself and the best thing I can do for you is I can value myself and I can value you. Because if I can do those two things, if I am a person of value and you’re a person of value, then my next response is that I’m going to add value to you. So how do I do that? How does that happen? So let me give you just my little five cent step every day process of adding value to people. Here we go. Number one, I value people.
John Maxwell:
Okay? I go back to the golden rule. You know, treat others as I want to be treated. So every day I make sure that the core of everything I do is based on the fact that I value people. And the reason that’s so important especially for leaders, is leaders see more than others see, and leaders see before others see. And because of that, because I see more than most people, and because I see before other people, this gives me a very distinct advantage over other people. Trust me, in life, if you can see more and you can see before, you’re going to win the race. So the question is, what do I use? What do I do with that advantage? What do I do with the advantage? I can see more than I can see before. I can either use it for personal gain, or I can use it for your gain.
John Maxwell:
I can either manipulate you, which means I move you from my advantage, or I can motivate you, which means I move you for your advantage and personal and mutual advantage. So every day I value people. The second thing I do every day is every day I think of ways to add value to people. When I look at my calendar, I ask myself, who will I see, and what can I do? I want to encourage all of you to look at your calendar, what you’re doing tomorrow, see who you’re going to see, and ask yourself a very simple question. When I’m with them, what can I do that would add value to them? Number three, I not only value people and think of ways to add value to people, but number three, I look for ways to add value to them. In other words, when I’m with you, I’m constantly looking and saying, what can I do right now to add value to this individual? Wow. Because here’s what I know. Who I am determines what I see.
John Maxwell:
Just like who you are determines what you see. If I am a person of value who values people and wants to add value to people, guess what? I’m going to see all kind of opportunities to add value to you. Why? Because that’s who I am. I don’t see what’s before my eyes. There’s a whole bunch of things before my eyes. I don’t see. I see what I’m prepared to see, and how I view others is how I view myself. Now, this is huge.
John Maxwell:
So how do I add, how do I do this? How do I look for ways to add value to people? Well, I love to play golf. When I’m on a golf course, one of my desires is to find somebody that’s working the ground. You know, maybe somebody’s raking the traps, the maintenance people. And I intentionally separate myself from the other golfers for a moment. I go over and introduce myself, and I thank them for their hard work and how beautiful they make the course. And then I give them a financial. I just slip them some money and say, hey, take your family out to eat today. And my name’s John, I’m your friend, and I move on.
John Maxwell:
If I’m in a restaurant, especially if I. It’s a single mother or it’s an elderly person, you know, I make sure that I give them a great tip. You want to be conscious and look for ways that you can begin to add value to the people around you. These are people I don’t even know. In fact, every day I make it intentional that I give something to somebody that doesn’t know me at all. I can’t benefit at all from them. Okay. The first question I ask anybody that I do know is, you know, how can I help you? What can I do? So every day, I value people.
John Maxwell:
I. Every day, I think I value people every day. I look for ways while I’m with them to add value to people. And number four, every. Every day I do things that add value to them. I not only think and look, but I actually do things. In fact, I ask myself every night, who did I add value to and how did I add value to them? And I always have a goal. And this is a simple goal, but it’s really good.
John Maxwell:
I want to be the first to add value to people. You know, when you’re first, you set yourself apart from everyone else. I watch people in the crowd often hesitate, and I often think, you know, if you wait till everybody else does something good before you do something good, it’s still good, but you get lost in the crowd. Be the first to help, be the first to add value. I try. And so I become. I become a person of action. So when I see that there’s action needed while other people are asking themselves, well, do I? Should I do this? I’ve already made up my mind because I prepared my mind.
John Maxwell:
My mind has already been made up. You know, my mentor, John Wooden, used to say, john, when opportunity comes, it’s too late to prepare. So I’ve already made my mind. So every day, I value people. Think of ways to add value to people. Look for ways to add value to people. Do things, add value to people. And finally, number five, every day I encourage others to add value to people.
John Maxwell:
In fact, that’s what I’m doing right now. I’m encouraging you to now begin to follow this process, because it’s literally, it’s the best thing you can do for yourself, but it’s also the best thing that you can do for others. I encourage you to be a person of significance, not just a person of success. Now, success is wonderful. It’s important. But success is pretty much about me. It’s very personal. It’s, you know, it’s how well I do in life, and, you know, how well I provide for my family and my home and things.
John Maxwell:
It’s all about me. Significance is all about others. And I want to encourage you to become a person of significance. I’ve known a lot of successful people that were not happy, but I’ve never met a person that does significance, that literally pours their life into others, that they’re all fulfilled, they’re all having a sense of inner deep satisfaction because they know it’s not about them. Once you have tasted significance, success will never satisfy you. Trust me. I hope this lesson’s helped you. It’s the best thing you can do for yourself, and it’s the best thing you can do for others.
John Maxwell:
And my name’s John, and I’m your friend.
Maxwell Leadership Certified Team:
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Mark Cole:
Hey, welcome back. I talked about two of my podcast friends that I met just in the last weeks in my preamble to John’s lesson today. And just during the lesson, I was thinking again of more of you women and men that you give us comments each and every week. We’ll wrap up today’s podcast with comments and I want to challenge you. I want to challenge you. Take a moment and let us know how we’re doing on your podcast player of choice. Give us a comment. Please give us a question.
Mark Cole:
I would love to have more questions from our podcast friends or just tell us something that we can do to improve it and make it more value add to you. By the way, if your podcast player gives ranks or stars, give us a rank. Let us know how we’re doing and how we’re hitting the ball for you because we are here to add value to you and tracy. I was thinking, while John was teaching today, of all the lessons, and we’re at 320 plus lessons, of all the episodes, if you ask me which one I think John Maxwell lives out the most, it would probably be this one. Just a few weeks ago, we were traveling to Colombia to the country of Columbia. We had been invited down there with the president and our pilot. Jerry Anderson is just, he’s an equipped board member. He’s just a gift straight from God to John and I and helps us get from point a to point b so often.
Mark Cole:
But before he kind of came into our world, he was launching roundtables in the country of Columbia and doing such an incredible job. And I’ll never forget, this was two weeks ago. John gets on the plane, says, mark, I thought of something epic to do when we get to Columbia. He said, I’m going to go, and I’m going to get Jerry Anderson a Mont Blanc pen in Columbia to tell him how thankful I am for what he did in Columbia, because I now stand on his shoulders, guys. I was like, oh, my goodness. Well, Jerry comes back mid flight, and John says, jerry, I gotta tell you what I’m gonna do. He can’t hold anything like that. He’s got tell it.
Mark Cole:
He said, jerry, when we get there, you know, I get Mark Cole of Mont Blanc everywhere we go. It’s kind of our thing. And he helps me create this collection. That’s unbelievable. He said, we’re not going to go to get Mark one today. We’re going to go get you one, because what you did for years in Columbia, in the correction facilities and in the school systems. He said, I want to memorialize that impact. Traci, I watched a 74 year young man weep and said, I have never had something more thoughtful given to me.
Mark Cole:
This is a very, very successful business guy. Here’s the point. What John did that day is exactly what he’s telling us in this lesson. Who will I see and what can I do? Who will I see and what can I do? And I’ve watched him do that over and over and over again. And so I’m very excited about this lesson. It was this lesson, as I said earlier, that sparked the podcast. What can we do? Who will we see? Our podcast listeners. What can I do? Add value to you today.
Mark Cole:
And so, Traci, I’m super excited to have you with him.
Traci Morrow:
I love that. I love that story that you kicked us off with that. And I love that for Jerry. That’s so special. And I love for people to hear the little behind the scenes stories of John just being John, because that was one of the biggest treats for me. You know, how many times do you want to meet somebody who you really look up to, either by their teachings or their writings, and you meet them in person and they’re kind of, it’s kind of a disappointment. We’re all human. We’re all human.
Traci Morrow:
But when you find that they don’t practice what they teach, and that is one of the most wonderful things about John. He is absolutely human. So we are not talking about him as if he is anything other than a human being, but he is wonderful in the fact that he really does practice what he teaches. And absolutely, this lesson, you know, we use this as really the pillars of the relationship lane for John. These pillars are really what it is to be a relational person, a relational leader. And so I’m thrilled to get into it. And I love that John assesses and has assessed what has been his best advice he’s ever received. Think of all the people in the world John has methadone and had an audience with and private conversations with.
Traci Morrow:
And I love that his best advice he ever received came from his dad. And so the first thing before we get to questions, I just want to encourage our listeners, if you’ve never done this before, to take some time after you listen to this podcast to assess what has been the best advice you have ever received and why, you know, to have a dinner with John or time with John, he will ask. This is one of the questions that he asks around the dinner table, and this would be a question for you to ask around the dinner table, because what it does is you get the best advice everybody around the dinner table has ever received, which means you get that advice as well. But let’s talk about Mark just right off the bat. The fact that of John’s education and all of the audiences that he’s had with all the people that I just kind of described, world leaders for generations that he has met with, talk about the power of John attributing his best advice being not the knowledge that he has, not how to make more money, not how to write a lot of books, but how to interact with other people. Can you just spend a little bit of time talking about that? That’s what he considers the greatest advice he’s ever received.
Mark Cole:
Yeah. And so I’ve heard him tell that story dozens of times. I’ve watched him live it out hundreds of times, and it feels so simple. And then, yet I watch how layered he is to make sure that he does that. And this session, from my standpoint, for those of you that are new podcast listeners, I don’t gushen every podcast about John Maxwell. I could. I’ve never been impacted by someone at such a level that he has. But this one could be the gushing session for John Maxwell because he truly is so intentional on this.
Mark Cole:
But yet he tells the stories, which I love, of how he learned how to be this intentional cause he wasn’t already. He tells the stories of missing an opportunity with somebody that he wishes he would have shared the importance of his faith with. He tells the story of allowing somebody in one of his first leadership assignments that bought the mill every single week. And he didn’t realize that he was getting in deficit each time that he let that happen. He talks about all these moments that he failed to be able to learn to be so intentional. So I really could, I promise you, I could fill this episode with things that blow me away of how John Maxwell adds value. Just yesterday I’m on a plane with him and it’s his oldest granddaughter’s birthday. And I’m just going to leave it there because if we have time, I’m going to tell you the rest of the story.
Mark Cole:
But I leave you a cliffhanger because I could do that every single day. I watch such a level of intentionality in John Traci that he says there’s times that he was never this good. And perhaps so 24 years ago, really 21 years ago when I started getting real intimate access to John, close proximity access to John, man, it has been a non stop journey of waking up and say, who will I see? What can I do? Who is going to be in my environment today and what is a way I can add value to them. And I do believe that comes with a level of intentionality, to learn from moments that you don’t do that so that you can have more moments that you naturally do do that for all of us. I can tell you a story of how I added value to our leadership team just today, because ten days ago I realized that I did not add value to the room and I had to go correct it. But I’ll tell you this, I don’t think I’ll do that same mistake the next time because I’m learning from it. And what my hope and desire for you today is that we give you a story or John gives you a point that helps you understand the power of how you can do things for others around you.
Traci Morrow:
Yeah, this is a great lesson. This is like who John Maxwell is and without making him sound, again, like you say, we aren’t trying to deify him or in any way. We’re just trying to say, like, this is his strength. This is why he’s so loved for so many decades. And so let’s do a deep dive study of what makes him so lovable in such a genuine way. So before we get to them, the pillars, what I call the pillars, he talks so often, for so long, decades, in fact, about seeing more and before. You got to see more and before. So could you just before we dive into this lesson, could you just share with our listeners, how does someone look for more and before, what does that really mean, to see more and before?
Mark Cole:
Yeah, I think, number one, if you’re a leader on a team and other people are seeing things before you and other people are seeing bigger opportunities than you, you might be the leader in position. You are not the leader. Leaders see more and before. They see before everybody else sees and has to enlighten people, and they see more than other people see. They see opportunities, they see potential obstacles that others don’t see. That is one of the distinct identifiers, leadership. And so just first and foremost, I’ll tell you that you’re going to have to start looking so in this idea of seeing more and before in valuing people, I told John the other day, I said, john, I don’t know that I can ever get to a place that I can think of ways to add value to people like you do, that I can look for ways to add value to people like you do. And he said, oh, yeah, you can, because it takes work, it takes practice, it takes discipline to wake up every day and do that.
Mark Cole:
And I went, he just demystified this whole thing for me.
Traci Morrow:
Yeah.
Mark Cole:
And that’s where we’re going to get to these five pillars. John really does see more and before, but that was not a natural born ability. That was a developed discipline in the area of adding value to people. So don’t despair. Those of you that are not gifts is not your love language. That’s okay. You can still get better at seeing more and before in ways to add value to people. And that, that’s the biggest encouragement that I can give you.
Mark Cole:
You do not have to do this naturally, but you do have to do it consistently to get more and before.
Traci Morrow:
Yeah. And I think the root has to be from a place of self confidence. He starts with valuing people, but he snuck it in just almost if you might have missed it if you weren’t really listening, but he said, I value myself first, and of course, I value others. And he rode right into it, and I want to go, like, put on the screen, put on the brakes. He values himself. And I think so many people dive right in and try to value people, but they almost to the point of, you have to first stop and say, do you have value for yourself? Because not everybody does. And if you jump into valuing other people, you will do it at the detriment of yourself. You’ll devalue yourself as you’re trying to value others, and you’ll get far enough down the road and in these points, in these, what I call pillars of relationship, of John’s best advice, that you’ll get to a place where you will either have self loathing or you have put yourself so far bottom to the bottom of your list that you’ll realize, like, I’m starting to not value others because I’m starting to resent others.
Traci Morrow:
And so really, it’s really important. The very first predez precursor to valuing people is you really do need to value yourself.
John Maxwell:
Well, let me.
Traci Morrow:
And John is great at that.
Mark Cole:
Yeah, let me come off of that just a moment, Traci, and give you a real illustration of a teammate that I’m working with right now, brilliant teammate of mine on our leadership team, and just has this unbelievable, uncanny ability to lift people. They’re just so bright, so, so amazing. They edify and lift and encourage people. Some time ago, as I began to work with this leader on a certain two or three items, actually, I realized how negative they were to themselves. And I went, whoa, I didn’t see that. I’ve never heard negative about anybody. And now all of a sudden, I’m digging into you with this, and there’s this negative perspective. And I went, what is that? The more I uncovered, the more I went there, the more I realized that was a common opinion or self assessment of this individual.
Mark Cole:
And I said, let me tell you this. If you don’t change the value with which you see in yourself and the value that you give to yourself, it’s going to start coming out toward others, even though you’ve never been known for that, of devaluing people.
Traci Morrow:
It’s so true.
Mark Cole:
This leader then said, well, do you want to know what I really think about that person? Do you really want to know what I think about that person? I said, I do. And they began to tell me of challenges they had with that person, and they don’t know how to get over it. And so the positivity was a farce or a pose because they didn’t want to change their perspective. And I went, I can tell you why you’re having this because you have not learned how to see the value in yourself first. So when you see the flaws that are in all of us, in that person, you begin to impose in them what you see in yourself. And I said, that’s why you’re doing that. And they went, oh, my goodness. And I can tell you, even right now, just after about a month of working with this individual at that level of depth, they’ve already began to self talk and now talk about themselves in a much greater way.
Mark Cole:
So, Traci, I 100% agree with you. You cannot value others if you don’t value yourself. That’s not a self statement. That’s not a self absorbed statement, that’s not an egotistical statement, not a narcissist statement. It is a statement that says you will not be able to sustain valuing others if you don’t first value yourself.
Traci Morrow:
Because John says all the time, we see people not as they are, we see them as we are. And so if we are ignoring how we view ourselves, we’re going to see them through the filter of how we view ourselves, and it’s going to eventually get caught up with us, like the example that you just gave. So that’s amazing. So, number one, I value people. And John says so often, and he touches on it a little bit in this lesson, but he really does a deep dive in it when he teaches this in depth. He’ll say, if I, if you don’t love your people, if you don’t care for the people that you’re leading, you will be tempted to manipulate them. And that is for your own benefit, because once you make the connection, like the person you were just talking about, if you make a connection with a person and it’s under a false faking it to kind of make it, and you’re trying to fake that love for them, then they will develop a love for you back believing that you care for them, which inside you’re like, you know, you should see all the problems I have with you, even though I’m smiling to your face, then you can begin to manipulate their love and loyalty to you. So talk a little bit about that difference between the leaders that you’ve seen.
Traci Morrow:
I know you’ve seen them in the time that you’ve been leading a team, leading organizations, but leading team leaders. You’re a leader of leaders. Talk about the difference. I know you’ve seen it between a leader who uses that advantage for personal gain. And that advantage is having the loyalty and love of your team because they feel the love and value from you using that for personal gain versus using it for the gain of the team or the individual.
Mark Cole:
So it’s such an apropos question today. I taught several hundred of our certified team members around the world, and I’m teaching them on high road leadership. John’s newest book, by the way, I happen to have it right here. For those of you that are podcast viewers, I’m holding up the book High Road leadership that John wrote this year. It’s just released this year. I was teaching out of chapter four, which is do the right things for the right reasons, which is motive. And John, in that chapter, Traci, I know you’ve read it. John, in that chapter, he parallels the difference between motivation and manipulation, and he talks about how motivation is to inspire others for what’s best for them.
Mark Cole:
Manipulation is to inspire others in what’s best for me. And it’s a great chapter. In fact, now that Traci’s brought this up, you’re going to want to go reread this or go buy it and read it, because what John really says is there’s a thin line. A lot of times people say, well, what’s their motive? If their motive is not pure, then they’re going to manipulate people. No, I’ve seen people with a pure motive that’s manipulated people. In fact, I’ve seen somebody the last time I looked in a mirror that did that just two weeks ago. In other words, me, I was in a leadership meeting and I was trying to get them to understand the vision that I had. And one of the questions kind of got me sidetracked to think they don’t even know what the vision is.
Mark Cole:
And so I began to try to use my style of leadership, which is very passionate, to convince them to understand my agenda, my perspective, rather than slowing down and understanding where that leader was coming from. In their off based remark. Their remark was off based, but it wasn’t an indication of vision separation. It was a misunderstanding of how to apply the vision. But I began to categorize it as a misappropriation of vision in the lead team, and I spent 40 minutes using the coal hammer, boom, boom, boom, driving home the vision only for have somebody come up after me and say, you know, that was just a misunderstanding, not a vision leak or a vision disconnect. And Traci, what I did in that moment showed how someone with a good motive, I feel like that I have a good motive, someone with a good motive could misuse my style of leadership, which is very much emotional. And my passion became intensity, and I undermined the impact of that leader and that leadership team. For the moment, until I caught it, I was choosing manipulation in a meeting to get my agenda across to them.
Mark Cole:
And that’s why John is saying, man, we have got to, even as leaders with great motives, we’ve got to think of ways, look for ways, actually do things that add value to people on a daily basis.
Traci Morrow:
And I think that what you just described is something for those of you who have taken the strength finders test, can relate to this. If you really slow down your pace to think, if you in any way identify with having woo, winning others over, that is a strength that can be used as a weakness. You know, there’s always an underbelly of every strength, that if you use it incorrectly, or if you just use it without thinking, being intentional, with even the gifts and strengths that you have, you can manipulate people without meaning to, just to get to the end result, rather than really serving and seeing the people that you serve. And I love that you always use those examples, Mark, that hopefully this portion of the podcast is for using our personal examples of putting into play what you have personally seen up close with John, but also as you put it into play in leading Maxwell leadership. Okay, so you gave a great example, Mark, at the beginning of what John did with Jerry and the Mont Blanc Pen. And for those of you who have never heard of a Mont blanc pen, I had never heard of a Mont blanc pen when I first met, try and say that pen name three times fast when I first met John. And since then, like I hear about it all the time, I now see it. You know, that’s kind of the action attraction, the rule of action attraction.
Traci Morrow:
But now I hear about it all the time. And what that is is a great example of he thought ahead of time of what he was going to do to bless Jerry, and then he looked for the Mont Blanc store of what he was going to do. And then he actually followed through and he did it. And so, are there things, are there times in your schedule where you think each day, spend time thinking of the people you’re going to meet that day and ways that you might bless them and then look for those ways? Do you have like a one two punch of thinking and looking four ways each day according to your calendar? Or sometimes it’s out in advance because you might need to order something or like a gift or something. It doesn’t always have to be something with money oftentimes it doesn’t have to do, adding value doesn’t have to do with something to do with finances. It could just be serving somebody or showing up for them with your time. How does that look like in your life and how it plays out?
Mark Cole:
Well, again, let me say this, and I’m going to. You can come back and dig into anything that you want to, Traci. I’m going to illustrate, think, let look and do all right here in something. But let me, let me say this. So you ask for me. Yes, but let’s, let’s, again, keep in mind I am a novice in an expert world of adding value to people. I’m a novice at this. And I tell you, I feel that every time I watch John do the Jerry thing or what I’m getting ready to describe to you, it is not for me to understand and even illustrate this lesson as much as it is John.
Mark Cole:
So I do. Every morning I look at the people that I’m meeting, and I think, okay, who am I meeting and where can I add a unique surprise. Wow. Of value in today’s agenda? And I do that every morning I wake up, and that’s one of my disciplines. Every morning. What is the key thing I need to accomplish today in all of my meetings? What is the one thing I want to go to bed tonight going, I nailed that. And then the other question that I ask is, where can I add surprise. Wow.
Mark Cole:
Value today? But, John, and this is all wrapping up the think, look and do peace. John thought of a way many years ago to wow his grandchildren. And, Traci, you and I were talking about parallel tracks of grandparenting right now. John decided several, several years ago, many years ago, a way that he could do something very unique for his grandchildren. Is every birthday, write them a poem from Papa’s pen. And so he writes this poem out. It’s now by text, by the way. And so he thought of a way that would be very unique.
Mark Cole:
The reason I say this is because I gave you a cliffhanger just a moment ago about this story. We were on a plane just yesterday, we were on a plane coming home, and John went, oh, I’ve got to add value to Madeline, who’s turning 24 today, and this is the year she’s getting married. She’s getting married in a few months. And he says, I need to weave that into the poem today. So what he did, he’s already thought of a way to add value, but he’s looking for a unique way to make this one a little bit different than all the others. And so he brought in her significant other that she’s committed marriage to. And it was an incredible poem that all included how this was a new season. And while it’s a new year, it’s not just a new year, it’s a new season.
Mark Cole:
And it’s rhyming. And it sounds like Doctor Seuss is sitting on the plane right beside me because we are just rhyming our way to this encounter. Incredible memory. And let me tell you where dew comes in. We had been on 12 hours worth of flying. We had been all around the world. The craziness of our schedule was insane. And he went, whoa, slow everything down.
Mark Cole:
I’ve got to do this today because I don’t want her waking up without my poem. Because she hadn’t woke up without a poem in many, many years. See, when you think of ways and you look for ways, which is thinking, I did that years ago. And I thought of a way that I can make myself very special to my grandkids on their birthday. I look for ways to be take it to the next level, because this is marriage here. And then I don’t care where I am in the world. I don’t care what I’ve just done. I don’t care how tired I am.
Mark Cole:
I’m going to do it before I lose it. And it’s just a brilliant place to where John has thought of it, pre thought of it. He looks for ways to make it very special. He does it no matter what the demands are on his schedule, right then.
Traci Morrow:
He is so good. And I cannot. I love the fact that he does this for his grandkids. And again, I watch him and hear about this, and the first thing I want to do is I’ll sit and take notes to myself to remember the kind of Grammy I want to be. I have three grandkids. One is on the way. And to me, I’m always looking for ways that I can create something. You and I, we touch a lot of people.
Traci Morrow:
We’re involved with. We love people. We’re involved with people on a much smaller scale with John. But I always want to have something really special for my kids, for my kids significant others, and for my grandkids. I hope that John does that.
Mark Cole:
And so let me say this. We’re out of time, but let me say this. That’s the fifth point. John’s story encourages others to add value to people. Let me tell you this right here. I don’t know what tradition or what situation your grandkids are getting ready to have from you, Traci. But after this podcast, I’ll tell you this right here. John Maxwell accomplished number five in his life.
Traci Morrow:
It’s gonna be better. It’s gonna be better.
Mark Cole:
Encouraged you to think of a new way and an even greater way to value your grandkids. That’s the same thing with me. I mentioned a moment ago about high road leadership, and I mentioned chapter four. I really would encourage you to pick that book up. But let me tell you this, speaking of adding value to you, our team wants to add value to you. We have a high road leadership assessment that helps you determine what kind of leader you are. And so I want to give that to you for free. We’re going to link that in the show notes.
Mark Cole:
You’re going to be able to buy the book in the show notes and be able to get that. Because again, we exist to add value to leaders who multiply value to others. We have a listener comment that I wanted to share with you today, which was from Calista, and Calista said, thank you so much. This is really an educative podcast and I’m just going to tell you this, Traci, it never gets old meeting our podcast friends. It never gets old getting to hear comments like this. And it never gets old challenging people to bring powerful, positive change to the world around them because everyone deserves to be led well.
High Road Leadership Book:
Are you ready to elevate your leadership to new heights? Join the movement towards high road leadership with John C. Maxwell’s latest book. In high Road leadership, John explores the power of valuing all people, doing the right things for the right reasons, and placing others above personal agendas. Learn how to inspire positive change and bring people together in a world that divides. Order now and receive exclusive bonuses, including a keynote on high road leadership by John Maxwell himself and a sneak peek into three impactful chapters. Take the first step towards becoming a high road leader. Visit HighRoadLeadershipBook.com to order your copy today.
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