5 Steps to Stop the Sneaky Sin of Gossip

When I was a kid, I loved watching “Little House on the Prairie” on television. Laura Ingalls was exactly the sort of girl I fancied myself to be. I vowed never, ever to grow up to be like Mrs. Oleson, the nasty, arrogant, petty mother of Laura’s archnemesis, Nellie. To me, Mrs. Oleson was the epitome of a mean gossip, the kind of woman who’d sling secrets about a saint if she could.

I imagine the apostle Paul, when he was writing to Timothy about the proper behavior of widows, had a Mrs. Oleson type in mind when he wrote 1 Timothy 5:13, warning against those who “learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not” (ESV). In reality, though, gossips aren’t confined to arrogant, petty, wealthy women with too much time on their hands but all of us. 

Gossiping is when someone reveals personal or sensational facts about others—talking about people and their private lives and intimate details, often habitually. Various Hebrew words for “gossip” translate as a talebearer, one who reveals secrets or slanders others, or an evil tongue. 

Gossip might involve hearing a story about someone and then sharing it with others or talking behind someone’s back about their personal life or issues. Sometimes, this involves spreading lies or irresponsible information, but other times, it’s sharing the truth about events and circumstances that a person might not appreciate you speaking about. For example, two men talking casually about a third man’s marital strife can be considered gossip, as can coworkers speculating about a manager’s absence. Often, gossip is mean-spirited, though it can also be lighthearted and seemingly innocent. But make no mistake: Sharing information about other people, particularly information not confirmed to be true or shared without someone’s knowledge, is gossip. And gossip is a sin.

Romans 1:29-32 includes gossip among the many traits of those who are unrighteous, as does 2 Corinthians 12:20. Several proverbs also warn about the dangers of gossiping, as it sows strife among people (Proverbs 11;13, 17:9, 20:19, 25:9-10). In Matthew 18:15, Jesus urges, 

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.”

However, gossiping is different from righteous airing, bringing to light repeated or wanton sins, or holding others accountable in a godly manner (Matthew 18:16-17, 1 Timothy 5:20). If you struggle with gossiping or keep trying to convince yourself it’s harmless but know in your heart it is not, here are five steps to stop gossiping.

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